One of the more uncomfortable cultural differences for me in the classroom is the absence of small talk at the beginning of class. I always like to start class by just chatting and asking questions like, "How was your weekend?" or "What's up - anything new and exciting going on on campus?" etc. Unfortunately, the students never really know what to say or don't like volunteering anything (or both). I have talked to my tutor about this and explained to her that in my culture it's customary to have a little bit of small talk before getting down to business. My tutor, Daisy, said that they don't really do that in China and that the teacher usually just walks in, greets the students and then immediately starts class. In any case, I am persisting with the small talk even though it usually ends up with both parties feeling wildly uncomfortable. Whatever.

Since I am with groups of smaller students at my part-time job at Web, they have gotten used to chatting together before the lesson starts. Pretty much all of the foreign teachers at Web take the first 10 minutes or so to just talk about what's going on in students' lives or current events. I love hearing what the students are up to because many times they are doing things completely foreign to me. Take yesterday for example.

I was in a class at Web with my favorite (and most adorable student ever) named Momo and when I asked her what she was up to she replied that he hadn't been feeling very well lately. When I asked what she did the previous day, she said that since she got a cold she went immediately to the hospital to get an "IV drip." "You get an IV drip even if you just have a cold?" I asked incredulously and then asked her to explain.

Momo said that getting intravenous therapy in China is becoming more and more common even for small discomforts like a cold. She said that it takes about two hours and costs about 200 RMB (about $30 - pretty pricey by Chinese standards). She said that most people use this type of therapy at least once a year. Sure enough, I spent the whole day asking students whether they had ever had an IV drip before and all of them had. It seems to be more popular with the younger generation, however, since most of my adult students said that they would only go if things got really bad. When I asked Momo what was in the IV drip she didn't know; she said that it was probably medication and that the liquid was very cold to reduce your fever. I had never heard of this before and had no idea that it was so common in China especially for things like a cold.

Today, when I was reading the Beijing Review (an English magazine for foreigners in China), there was an entire article devoted to intravenous therapy titled "To Drip or Not to Drip; Heavy use of intravenous therapy in China causes concern." The article mentioned that China is the world's biggest user of IV therapy averaging 8 bottles of fluid per person while the world average is about 3 bottles per person. "In China, IV infusion has become a common medical therapy, while in foreign countries it is sometimes even considered a minor operation with significant risk."


So why is this happening in China? My students in Web told me that they like to get IV treatments because it is a quick fix; it supposedly cures your cold immediately. Many of the recent college graduates told me that IV therapy is essential to them because they are so busy in their jobs that they can't afford to miss days because of sickness. "Three kinds of people favor IV infusion the most: Those who have taken pills for several days with no visible effect yet; parents who push doctors to use IV therapy on their children because of a favorable curative effect in the past; and those who are busy and have stress-filled lives and want 'quick-fix' therapy and a quick recovery."

But the Chinese adults that I talked to (unless they had children) thought that getting fluids was crazy and that the price was constantly going up as a means for doctors and hospitals to make more money. The article hints at this as well. "The heavy use of IV therapy is absolutely abnormal and even ridiculous. Most patients don't actually need it, but IVs are now even frequently recommended by doctors as a means of curing colds. Some hospitals are questioned by patients for their overuse of IV therapy because of economic profit."

When I saw Momo again later in the week and asked how she was feeling, she said she felt great and concluded it was all because of the fluids she had gotten at the hospital. As other students joined the class we chatted about some of the pros and cons that I had heard recently about the treatment. When I asked the (mostly younger) class if they would still plan on getting an IV infusion the next time they have a cold they all nodded their heads "definitely." One student said, "If it works everyone will keep doing it because it makes you feel better fast; it doesn't matter how much it costs."

Good news - I'm back online! After about two weeks of communicating back and forth with Witopia I kind of gave up and got fed up with all the stuff that was taking me a long time to do and without any improvement. They have been a good VPN company for all the time I have been in China but ever since this last big firewall push, they haven't worked for me. I started asking around and a lot of other expats use a company called "Strong VPN." So I decided to give them a try ($10/month) and so far they have been great. They have live chat help and also remote help. I had never heard of remote help before but it was awesome. After spending a few hours trying to do the complicated set-up by myself, I gave up and retreated to the live chat help. At that point we both logged on to a program called "TeamViewer" which lets the tech guy in the US work on my computer from afar (isn't that crazy?! I didn't know you could do that!). In about 10 minutes he had the problem fixed and I was back on the American internet. I re-posted the pictures for the St. Patty's Day post and the "Pass the Salt" post so hopefully they will work now.


In other news Sean cooked a big Mexican dinner and I had people over for "Mexican night." Tacos, Mexican pasta salad, Mexican rice, spicy tortilla soup and guacamole - everything was delicious! Annika, a German teacher here, decided that we should start a "girls' night" once a week so beginning on Wednesday evenings all the female teachers are going to start hanging out (along with Qin Chen, Zhen zhen, Zhou Min and whoever else is around). It should be fun considering sometimes on campus it feels like every night is "guys' night." We have also started getting together with the Germans on Sunday afternoons for a "Sunday tea and coffee." They have real beans and coffee makers so they provide the coffee and I bring cookies or cake - it works out well for everyone!

I'm still struggling with the whole VPN/internet firewall thing, so no pictures for now. I have a list of some odd aspects of Chinese society that have entertained me lately and will post about those for a bit until I can post pictures and talk about the Philippines.

Today I went to the foreign language building to make copies, return and check out some magazines and check the post office. It was 11:15 in the morning when I reached the building and unfortunately, most offices were closed for lunch. I couldn't make copies and I couldn't go to the library because all the workers were taking their break. Another foreign teacher was there wanting to do similar things but a Chinese professor told us they wouldn't be open again until after lunch at 2pm.

This is not really a big deal because I have lots of time and can just return in the afternoon after lunch, but it always amazes me how long the noon break is. Last year I could count on the offices being open until 11:45 or at least 11:30 but this year it seems people are sneaking off to lunch at around 11. And after lunch they are open until about 4:30 but sometimes they close at 4 - you just never know. When I asked the Chinese professor why this was happening, he said the workers wanted to get to the cafeteria first to avoid the long lines of students eating lunch and dinner. I can certainly understand this; the average campus lunchtime migration is a larger crowd of people than an American can even dare to imagine. The hungry and impenetrable mob of people surging toward the cafeterias is a twice-daily event I try and avoid altogether.

So what do the Chinese do during their noon break? First they eat which takes about 5-10 minutes. They eat very quickly in order to maximize the time that they can nap. The noon siesta is a sacred part of the day and is not to be disturbed. Campus quiets down significantly as everyone is snoozing from 12-2 - it's amazing! I was always familiar with the Latin American siesta, but I never knew that the Chinese napped until I came here. It can be a little maddening if you want to get things done during that time, but since there is no way I am going to change the system, I had better adapt and start taking naps myself and get up at 5am like everyone else.

The thing about the extended noon break that seems so odd is that it doesn't seem like the school workers do much when they are supposed to be working. I know this is not the case with everyone, but from my experience whenever I go into one of the copy offices or the library, the ladies are a) playing computer games like Happy Farm b) on their phone c) on the QQ chat program d) watching a movie on their computer or e) sleeping. This is fine for me because everyone is always up for chatting and practicing Chinese/English and there is definitely a relaxed vibe, but it's still kind of funny.

Apparently, the government jobs are the worst (best?). My students tell me that the best job to get is one with the government because then you really don't have to do anything - all that's expected of you is drinking tea and reading the newspaper. No wonder the students that have gone abroad and interned at a German or Swiss company come back shocked at the difference in work culture. One of my students at Web said, "They [the Germans] are so efficient while sometimes we Chinese don't get things done quickly." I'm just going to go out on a limb here and guess that a German company doesn't have a 3 hour siesta in the early afternoon.

Anyway, the cool thing about today was that the post office was open and we got an Easter package from Sean's dad. It was chock full of: peeps, cadbury eggs, jelly beans, chocolate peanut butter eggs, Easter candy corn and malt eggs. YUM. Unfortunately, the can of spam and hash were confiscated (read: eaten for lunch by a Chinese government worker) and didn't make it. Sad.

If you can't see pictures on the blog, you are not the only one - nobody can see pictures =( This is probably due to the fact that I switched VPNs (what gives me uncensored internet) because my old one has stopped working but this new one doesn't let me upload pictures properly, apparently. This makes me sad because, let's be honest, blogs are only fun if there are pictures. I don't really know how to solve this problem so any advice would be appreciated. Until I can figure this out, I'll try to post about things that don't require pictures. Lame.

Although there are many annoying, frustrating and stressful things about living abroad, my favorite thing about living in China is that it's never boring - there's always something interesting, funny, different or just plain crazy going on. Living here is a daily process of new observations; sometimes they're mundane like finding out I can buy chocolate snack-pack puddings at a store down the road from the university or arguing with a Chinese professor about how American colored and patterned napkins are actually not bad for our health, but other times they are hilariously entertaining and deserve a post of their own.

The other day, I got a text from my Chinese roommate who said that everyone in China was buying salt like crazy and that if I needed some I should probably buy some too. I vaguely remember that I deleted the text and went back to my nap without giving it a second thought. Crazy and unintelligible texts from Chinese friends are common and I usually chalk them up to mistakes in translation or cultural differences. This text, however, was accurate in that millions of Chinese around the country were, in fact, buying up salt in record numbers.



After more Chinese friends mentioned that their parents had already socked away 20-30 bags of the white stuff, I decided to look into this issue a little more closely. It turns out that rumors through cell phones and the internet had gone viral and started a national movement to buy salt and hoard it in order to protect against the radiation from the nuclear problems in Japan. As there were many different theories and rumors going around, I spent the day at my second job asking every Chinese student why people were buying salt.

I received two basic responses: the first was that eating a lot of Iodized salt will help shield the body from the harmful effects of radiation and the second reason was that many people believe that China gets most of its salt from sea water and that from now on all of the salt will be contaminated. Some of my students confessed to buying a lot of salt and others just laughed and said it was ridiculous. Many people in the countryside, however, took the rumors seriously and bought loads of salt. My roommate's parents as well as her friends parents now have over 30 bags of salt in their home.



Sean and I took a visit to the supermarket in our city and were met with mass chaos. All the stores were out of salt and the price of salt had risen from about 1 RMB a bag (about 15 cents) to in some places over 30 RMB (about $4.50). There were multiple salt distribution stations set up in each store and all of them were empty. Store workers assured us that there would be more salt available soon. Also, most of the soy sauce was out too. Apparently since soy sauce tastes salty, people thought that buying that up would be helpful too.



Recently, because of all of the hysteria, the Chinese government has issued a statement to calm people down and discourage the purchasing of NaCl in epic proportions.

Like I said before, the advantages of living abroad is that it's never boring and you are always apt to wonder, "What's next?"

I know most of you probably know Sean like this:

but I can assure you that at least once a year he puts down his books, takes off the glasses, comes out of his shell and decides to be social. The day that he does this normally occurs around March 17, which just happens to be Saint Patrick’s Day.

When it comes to Saint Patrick’s Day, Sean Patrick Doyle doesn’t mess around. Before I had even woken up for the day, he had already come over to use my kitchen to make a huge Irish breakfast: fried tomatoes, baked beans, eggs, toast, bacon and a Guinness – all while wearing a bright green shirt and leprechaun-patterned socks.

After classes and English Corner I had all the teachers over to my place for a green get-together. To celebrate, I made green cookies and my favorite dessert of all time: a chocolate Kahlua cake (thanks Mr. Doyle for sending all of the ingredients!). The cookies and cake disappeared in record time as did the green beer that Jordan and Sean made.

We all had a lot of fun and many people showed up including Chinese friends, other American teachers, and the new German teachers who are a hoot. Like usual, Sean was the first one to head to bed and we can only hope he will re-emerge to party again next year. Happy Saint Patrick’s Day!

*the lack of posting is due to the pesky Chinese government blocking all kinds of internet activity even the secure sites that expats usually use

It was our last day in Singapore and we spent it having a ton of fun. First we set off to one of the giant malls down town to do some climbing. While exploring earlier in the week, we had seen a promotion for 2 for 1 climbing because of Valentine's Day so Sean and I signed up for an indoor climbing session together.


We arrived expecting to do the typical partner climbing with someone belaying you so you can't fall. We had failed to realize that this was a different kind of climbing entirely - it was an activity called via ferrata that I had never heard of before.

Via ferrata is a type of climbing route up a wall or mountain using metal handles. This sounds (and looked) pretty easy, but the catch was that there was nobody belaying you, so you could potentially fall up to 10 feet. This made the activity terrifying. We climbed as partners with Sean as the lead climber and we had to pass about a 45 min. safety/training class before we could even start. By the time we had practiced everything, I wasn't really sure I wanted to attempt "via ferrata". Here's how Wikipedia describes it:

While via ferrata is similar to rock climbing the major difference is that the fall factor, which in climbing does not normally exceed two feet, can in via ferrata be much higher. These high factors are possible because the length of rope between harness and carabiner is short and fixed, while the distance the climber can fall depends on the gaps between anchor points for the safety cable.

We had to practice three different safety methods and ropes: looping ropes attached to each other to 'pigtails', transferring carabiners on our harnesses to wires along the route and snapping in to the rungs to rest if we needed a break. The indoor wall was the highest via ferrata in the world and to be honest I was really, really scared. I didn't look down the entire time because I knew it would be a little overwhelming. Midway up, Sean and I were both pouring sweat out of nerves and exertion, our arms and legs were shaking from poor technique and exhaustion and mentally I was spent. Our coach climbed up beside us the whole way on another climbing route and offered encouragement and advice while taking pictures. The sheer fact that I could fall and that I was completely responsible for myself that high on the wall was a new feeling and I found it hard to concentrate and trust the equipment. It was a really tough experience and took us about an hour to make it all the way up. I was definitely glad to be done and off the wall.

We rewarded ourselves with a Pizza Hut "Prosperity Pizza" for lunch and then went to see "Black Swan" in a refreshing air-conditioned theater. The whole week we had seen ads for the prosperity pizza because of the new year. During Chinese New Year businesses use anything related to future wealth, happiness, love and luck in the coming new year to get you into their store. The prosperity pizza is shaped like an old Chinese coin and it's a particularly lucky shape. Although the taste was extremely unusual: a tangy lime crust with cheese, bacon, french-fried onions and corn it was entertaining. I have no doubt it will help usher in an especially lucky year of the rabbit for us.

Recently I've had a few friends make comments like, "Your blog makes China sound like a dream, is it really that amazing?" Let me answer that with one word: nope. I think it's easy to blog about the positive stuff because I always want to make it seem like everything is ok and I don't want to complain because that's no fun. But sometimes China is not fun (for me at least). Could I spend the rest of my life here? Absolutely not. Am I excited to come home on July 5? You better believe it. For those of you have only heard the good stuff, let me balance things out a bit. Here's why I personally struggle with China:

1. The condition of the environment is pretty bad. The air quality is abysmal, the sky is gray, the rivers and lakes are toxic and if you're looking for nature you have to look long and hard.

2. There's people everywhere and they all stare at me all the time. The hordes of motorbikes, buses and cars can get a little overwhelming (and not to mention dangerous) at times and there is always a crowd of people everywhere.

3. Coming from the Midwest it's hard to be here and deal with behaviors that would be labeled inconsiderate and rude in my culture such as: pushing, shoving, spitting, cutting in line, not waiting for people to exit somewhere before entering . . . the list goes on and on.

4. Chinese society is noisy - all the time. People talk/yell/shout on their cell phones when you are crammed right next to them on a bus and nobody even bats an eye. If you're out in public, the volume is probably high. Answering your cell phone loudly in a movie theater packed with people is no big deal. Answering your cell phone at any time (interviews, class, meetings) is perfectly acceptable.

5. Everybody smokes. The doctor who gave me a physical last week was smoking while he did it and the nurse lit up while she signed the forms. People smoke in restaurants, elevators, hospitals and schools. They will even smoke under and next to "No Smoking" signs.

6. Living in a place where the government censors information from its people and doesn't encourage free expression is alarming - to say the least.

7. It's impossible to get anything done and we are frequently given the "Chinese runaround." This was common in Latin America too and it happens all the time here. If you need some help with something people will keep telling you to go somewhere else or call someone else until you go around in circles without getting anything done. For example, we have had English Corner now for 3 weeks and nobody will unlock the door for us. Although it's a very simple problem/issue, we've tried everything and there is no way we can solve it. Thus, we have EC outside where it's freezing though there's a perfectly good room provided. It's maddening.

8. The food tends to be greasy and chock full of msg. Also, you never really know what you are eating and even packaged food is hard to trust sometimes because of all the history with Chinese food scams (sawdust in baby food, cardboard in ground meat etc.)

9. China is a developing country and there are still a lot of problems with basic infrastructure. For example, there's no heat in the classrooms or other public buildings. Sometimes I don't have water or electricity. Sometimes my water comes out brown.

10. China can be a little dirty. There's a reason why nobody wants to put their bags on the ground anywhere. Little kids don't wear diapers - they just have a slit in their pants, so use your imagination. Sometimes they go right in front of you on the bus. Oh, and squat toilets aren't a picnic either - they can get pretty slippery and rank. There's never any soap, toilet paper or paper towels provided anywhere - bring your own.

11. Cheating/copying is the norm in business and in academia. Publishing in a 'scholarly' journal here is a joke and can be done by paying someone off. True, I do benefit from this by buying cheap, pirated DVDs - that's the only kind of DVDs that's available!

12. The amount of government corruption is pretty unbelievable and I know I haven't heard all of it. Knowing the right people and pricey bribes are the surefire way to get anything done.


Those are some ideas I just scribbled down in the last 10 minutes, but they should give you a more realistic picture (hopefully) of what foreigners deal with on a daily basis here. I'm sure there are others who handle it better than I do, and for the most part I've accepted that the things that bug me aren't going to change. Of course there are loads of good things about being here and I'm definitely glad I came. We were only planning on staying for one year but we liked it so much that we decided to stay a second. But in no way would I classify urban China as my type of paradise. It's been an interesting experience, that's for sure.

On the upside, we get to eat decorated apples! (I'll just refrain from thinking about how they make them that way)

One of the places that was highly recommended to visit in Singapore was the zoo. I love zoos and after the awesome night safari I was sure we wouldn't be disappointed with the quality of the zoo.


We spent the whole day at the zoo and there was still a lot we didn't have time to do. The neat thing about the Singapore zoo was that there were no cages - all the animal habitats were open air and there were even free roaming monkeys and orangutangs in tree-top exhibits all over the park.


Another cool thing was the amount of shows. There were marine shows, shows for kids, elephant demonstrations and a rainforest show. They were all really good and included lots of animals as well as audience participation.


My absolute favorite thing about the park was the amount of animal feedings that you could do. This cost extra ($5 for two people per feeding) but it was totally worth it. You could feed a variety of animals by yourself with a guide next to you, and Sean and I decided that out of all the choices we wanted to hang out with the manatees for a bit. It was so much fun! After paying our money, we picked up our bucket of apple, potato and carrot pieces and headed over to where the three huge manatees were chilling in their tank.

I have never really seen a manatee up close before, so it was really fun to be able to touch them and feed them their snacks. They were very gentle and had big soft noses and huge leathery mouths. They were very excited about the food and our feeding session was done all too soon. After that we got our picture taken next to a group of orangutangs.


My other favorite visit at the zoo was the miniature horses and the giant rabbits. Sean started sneezing as soon as we got near the "farm" area and we could only stay for a little bit, but I had a blast petting the tiny ponies - they were so stinkin' cute!


In the evening, after we made it back from the zoo, we joined Daniel for one last dinner together before he left in the morning for his trip to the U.S. We decided to eat in Little India and the food was awesome. We had spicy eggplant, lamb and lots of different flavors of nan - delicious!

We've received a lot of random gifts lately that I thought I would share with you. It's always interesting to see what Chinese people give us and every time it's a surprise. Sometimes I'm not quite sure what the gifts are, but they are always given from the heart. Recently, people have given us gifts for our wedding, for Christmas/Spring Festival or because they were moving away.

Max gave us an awesome vase from Tibet.


Daisy made me a cell phone charm.


April gave us some traditional ceramic figurines from her home town.


Xing xing gave us a traditional clay tea pot.


And Steve and Spring gave us our favorite (and most creative) gift so far - a live mountain Chinese scene complete with a tiny peasant farmer that you can move around. They thoughtfully included a spray bottle with water so we could keep the pot-o-nature alive by constant misting.


The generosity of our friends here has been overwhelming and it will be interesting to see how and what makes it home with us.

It's official. Sean and I have signed up to do the Great Wall Marathon in Beijing on May 21. Sean is going to do the full distance but I am going to do the 1/2 marathon. This marathon is a little more intense than normal as there are more than 5,000 steps and lots of steep grades. The official website actually recommends walking a little bit and taking it easy in some parts. Gulp. I know it is going to be painful but I'm hoping it will get me in some kind of shape for a particular wedding coming up and also the NOLS trip.

As a cool bonus, we get to stay with Daniel's dad in Beijing and he is going to run the race with us! Here's hoping we stay motivated enough to keep running enough in the next 12 weeks so we can survive the race.


In other news, posting has been difficult lately as the Chinese government has shut down many VPNs (ways to get around the firewall) - including mine, so I haven't been able to access blogger for a few days. Fortunately, Witopia, the company I work with, is always working on the blocks and has new solutions every few days. The recent censorship zeal stems from the problems in Libya, according to Witopia. It would seem that from the time I have saved from facebooking and blogging due to no free internet, I would have gotten a great jump start on race-training, but alas, I just found new ways to procrastinate.

At my part-time job at Web, there are a few students who stand out and one in particular - we'll call him Merlin. Web is one of the most well-known institutes to learn English in China and people attend for different reasons. Most of my students at Web are looking to get a new job or promotion, are bored and wealthy housewives, are younger students forced to attend by their parents or are taking a business trip to an English-speaking country in the near future. A small percentage of students, however, are there just because they like to learn and have an interest in the world outside of China. This is the type of person that Merlin is.

I met Merlin my first week at Web and could tell right away that he was smart - really smart. He also seemed really aware about social and cultural differences, the government and corruption in China and world news. Many adult Chinese businessmen I teach at Web are proud, loud, and can be a bit disrespectful, obnoxious and crude. Not Merlin. Merlin was always sensitive, soft-spoken and extremely polite and considerate to me as a female teacher. After class one day, he told me his story, which made me cry.

Merlin was educated in Nanjing (a fairly prestigious city in China) and became a doctor. During one surgery as a newer physician, he made a mistake which resulted in the patient dying. This devastated Merlin on a personal level but it also destroyed his career because he wanted to tell the truth about what happened to the patient's family. The hospital wanted to hide what happened (which is common practice here) and when they found out what Merlin wanted to do he was punished with heavy fines, prohibited from practicing medicine ever again and banished to working in the hospital's mail room. As a result of being treated unfairly, Merlin has continued to become interested in other areas of China's corruption as well as in the Christian faith.

Merlin doesn't have a lot of money and thus can only afford the group classes at Web. Sometimes, however, he gets lucky and is the only one signed up for the class which gives him the chance to talk to the foreign teachers one-to-one. We have talked many times together, but since Web installed microphones and cameras, our conversations have become much tamer. Before I left on winter break, I lent a few books about China (that are banned here) for him to read. He sent me an email while I was traveling about how he was doing and I decided to share a few parts with you.

Dear Sarah:

I have received the book and have read several pages. Thank you so much for introducing such a book to me. I think pages from 15 to 19 have provided me a penetrating answer to my personal experience. I am not saying I was innocent, I did make a serious mistake, which resulted in an unnecessary death. I mean the book helps me a lot to figure out what I should have known about when I was younger.

I think I have now recovered from the tragic depression, which has haunted me for a little more than one year. I have made my final decision（maybe actually I do not have many choices): to remain at my present place. Just as the book comments on Chinese people, I care about my family, I do not want to leave my family behind and, since my wife does not want to leave her parents, I will not force her to leave Changzhou together with me. I have tried several times and failed to find a job in some other hospitals in Changzhou, maybe due to lack of guanxi [connections]（I was astonished to see “guanxi”, the pinyin of the Chinese word for influential relationships, has become a formal English word in the book, indicating how notorious it is in eyes of foreigners), maybe because my gossip has already reached into the ears of leaders in those hospitals. Anyway I am determined to stay in this hospital, even at the price of destruction of my career as a doctor.

After I was transferred to my current office in September 2009, I began to possess a lot of free time. I had been engaged in too much learning and working before（our campus life is depicted in the book and does not need me to repeat). In October my wife got pregnant. In December I went to Web and began to learn English there. Because of the heavy fine I was imposed on, we had little money at that time. However my wife was considerate of me and approved of my decision to learn English.

Why do I learn English? My original purpose was to communicate better with the foreigners who go to the church in Changzhou and preach there regularly. All of them came from the US, and none of them were pastors. They work as teachers of English in schools in Changzhou and spontaneously go to preach in the church to a small group of less than 30 people, which is made up of spontaneous audience, and I have been one of them since I graduated from my university in Nanjing and came back to work in Changzhou in July 2005. However I wasn’t perfectly aware of my weakness in speaking and listening English at that time.

Living in a country which is ruled by Communist Party who believes in atheism, Christians may look strange and isolated from our society. My belief in Christ was conceived in 1999, the second year in my university. As an ordinary Chinese student, I received Theory of Evolution in middle school. Although I had little connections with the society outside campus, I could feel a lot of bad things or ideas from people（including myself, which I found later was called “sin” in the Bible). At about the same time, I learned a series of wonderful science like biochemistry, anatomy, histology and embryology, which made me hard to believe in atheism（Because human body is so wonderful! So perfect!). After I became a theist, I think going to church（secretly), reading Bible（secretly), listening to preaches（secretly); there is a famous Chinese pastor named Fengbingcheng living in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, not very far away from your hometown, (he is one of my favorite）and experiencing personal relationship（such as in my education, job and marriage）with God have contributed to my final choice to be a Christian.

No sooner had I entered Web, the small window through which we Chinese populace with very limited outlook have the opportunity to look outside at the world（and also look at the genuine China itself), than I felt it was worth the tuition of more than ¥20,000. I like to listen to foreigners’ views on everything, and I like to listen to American English（British English doesn’t sound very clear to me). There were three American teachers there at that time, one is Adam*, the other two have already quitted their jobs in Web.

While learning English, I was also wondering why my life had turned this way, whether I should insist on trust in God, and what does God want me to do, etc. Then YOU appeared. I think in our eyes you represent a classic example of American person: straightforward, independent, and robust. I remember in the first several English corner classes you gave us were about self-introduction, American marriage and American campus life. My wife is not a student in Web, but I managed to bring her into your English corner class about American marriage. She is poor in English and cannot understand a single sentence, so we sat in the far back and I leaned over and kept whispering translation of your every sentence to her during the whole class. I think you have the ability to make your classes lively and vivid, to arouse our interests and expectations. Besides, I have noticed that you are a warm-hearted person and ready to help others, unlike many other people I have seen. You have told us your family is religious and your brother is a missionary. To be frank, Sarah, I think it is not very safe to claim to be of religious beliefs like Christianity in public in China.

After I made the medical mistake on April 26^th , 2009, patient Z fell into a state of brain death. His treatments before April 26^th added up to around ¥100,000（He does not have any medical insurance and has to pay the money by himself or his family. His treatments of another 10 days in ICU（intensive care unit）cost ¥60,000. His family gave up on May 5^th because of too much cost and too little hope. When being asked about the reason why Z’s life went that way, the hospital leaders hid the truth out of understandable reasons. In fact their explanation was rather unconvincing, which was doubted by one of Z’s relatives. Out of humanitarianism, our hospital exempted his family from ¥40,000 altogether. His family was unsatisfied and tried to resort to a special committee and ask the local Health Bureau to solve the problem but finally retreated, maybe because they came to realize the mutual shielding and supports between hospital and government.

While Z was still sleeping in ICU, my department leader asked me to write down my thoughts about my mistake. Out of deep sorrow to Z and out of latent self-pride in my Christian belief（which I discovered later), I wrote I was a Christian and decided to tell Z’s family the whole truth someday in the future. I wrote this partly because I did not think it was all my own fault. This was the first time I decided to tell others my belief in public. My department leader directly presented my paper to our hospital leader, who, actually did not believe what I had written at first（maybe because few Chinese people believe in Christ and theism seems stupid to most of them), pointed out ironically that if Z’s family knew the truth, I would be in prison for at least one year.

In the end, I did not tell them the truth of course. After my gossip spread around the hospital（and even out of the hospital), many people told me my heavy penalty came from the fact that I had broken the hidden rules of the game, and I believe they were right. There are quite a few serious medical accidents taking place in our hospital every year, but I am the only one who is forbidden to be a doctor. Many colleagues including leaders advised me to get back to my previous position with bribery, which I am not very familiar with but is quite common in our society. I did not, however, because our hospital leader told me sincerely that I am not fit to be a doctor after my bad record was cleaned of recently.

Before April 26^th 2009, I had thought I was a devout Christian. Even on April 26^th morning I sent text messages of Psalms to one of my colleagues, persuading him to get along well with his wife. After that accident happened I came to realize how weak my confidence in God was. But when looking back on my experience today, I think God has answered me in Hebrews 12:5-6,“…because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son.”

I always remember your English Corner classes and thank you for the books and the help you have given me. Here are photos of my wife and son. One was taken 24 days after my son was born, the other two were taken when he was around 100 days old. May God bless you and your family!

Sincerely,
Merlin

Last night my roommate had her birthday party and we had a blast. We started out with a big dinner at a restaurant on campus and then went back to my house. Qin Chen had invited colleagues from work as well as former classmates from university. A few of the other foreign teachers came too which made for a rather large gathering.


We celebrated with cupcakes, fireworks, noisemakers, confetti and presents. The Chinese were also very interested in trying some different drinking games which was pretty funny. It was a fun party and a great way to start year 23 for Qin Chen. Happy birthday!

Religion in China is a tricky issue, to put it mildly. The students want to know everything about me but I'm not really supposed to talk about my faith which feels a little strange since it's a big part of who I am. The scary thing is, once I got scared about talking about my beliefs I found it hard to talk about it to anyone, even other foreigners. Hiding that part of my life became like a habit which is obviously not at all the point of being a Christian. This is word-for-word what my teaching contract says: "You are free to keep your own religious belief and to have your own religious life, but you are not allowed to talk about religion to the students either in class or outside class, nor to the Chinese teachers or anybody else. And you cannot invite other religious people to do anything relating to religion with the students. It is prohibited to convert anybody who is not religious before, either on campus or off campus."

If students ask if I'm religious (and they do often) I say that I'm a Christian but that's as far as I go. Many of them are very curious about it and frequently try to start conversations relating to it during English Corner. Another place where students constantly ask questions about my faith is at my second jobs downtown, particularly at Web. The questions they ask are tough and I always feel at a loss how to answer. Here's some examples that I've jotted down from last year:

"Do you think you're better than us because you believe?"
"How do you know it's all true?"
"How does your religion affect your life?"
"If religion is so important to you, why don't you try and convert me too?"
"Are you saying that all of the other religions are wrong?"
"Is it true that if I don't believe then my family and I are going to hell?"
"Why do you believe in God?"
"Why do you need to believe in God - why don't you just believe in yourself?"
"Do you believe that everybody should believe in God?"

I'm not trying to get in trouble or rock the boat - precisely the kind of actions that usually occur while following Christ even in the States - and I'm left constantly feeling inadequate and guilty since I usually change the subject or give a short answer to the questions I get regarding faith.

Not all people here are scared to talk about their beliefs, however, and one of my Chinese friends is incredible at sharing his faith. Because of him, there are many new believers at some of the places I work. He also runs a home church which he has to keep secret where he holds Bible studies and dinners. It's pretty impressive. The students who are new Christians are the ones who are usually most eager and enthusiastic about talking with me. It's pretty amazing to watch the slow spread of Christianity take place in an area that feels devoid of religion.

According to Wikipedia, since loosening of restrictions on religion after the 1970s, Christianity has grown significantly within China. It is still, however, tightly controlled by government authorities and only certain religious organizations are allowed. Many Christians choose however to meet independently of these organizations, typically in house churches. These fellowships are not officially registered and are seen as illegal entities that are persecuted heavily. For this reason some meetings take place underground, coining the term "underground church". These Christians have been persecuted throughout the 20th century, especially during the Cultural Revolution, and there remains some official harassment in the form of arrests and interrogations of Chinese Christians. At the same time, there has been increasing tolerance of house churches since the late 1970s.

Growing up in a place where it was safe, accepted, encouraged and actually considered "cool" to be a Christian (in West Michigan), being religious in a place where it is frowned upon is something of a shock and an experience that I feel unprepared, afraid and inadequate at dealing with. I guess I hope that who I am and what I do as a person can make some kind of difference instead of what I say, but I don't really know.

"What the hell do we do now? We're happily married, I'm actively saving for retirement, and we're not planning to have kids for a few years. It seems like my days are spent in a 50/50 split waffling between a) frantically investigating new life or career opportunities online and b) being completely at peace with my current life situation and seeking out new activities to enrich it: reading, working out, playing music, freaking out about political news, thinking up small business plans (to reduce the need for regular work) etc. Does this ever go away, or is this a constant life deal? It's actually probably uncharted territory, at least in terms of previous generations, because ours was really the first generation to grow up with creative spelling, "everyone's special, unique and wonderful" and "you can do whatever you want in life if you set your mind to it" guidance. With our "limitless" yet guided upbringing, our first steps into the uncharted real world are a tough adjustment. It's just one big game of Atlasphere." - Dan and Amanda's blog

I read this today on a friend's blog and I can totally relate. True, I'm not happily married (yet) but I agree with the author's take on both the joy and anxiety that go along with a life that might have more than one job or "career". I was only planning on being in China for one year but one year quickly turned into two years. We are not going to stay in China for a third year and it is going to be very hard to leave. Students (and family and everyone else) always ask me, "What's next?" and I tell them I'm working on it because I don't really know, though I have a lot of ideas. The problem is that many of those ideas are: a) non-paying b) competitive c) far away d) cost money e) want people younger than 30. Hmmm. I definitely want to return home and be near my family, but the thought of looking for a "real" job and making some roots freaks me out right now and I don't really know why.


I can reveal one plan in the works that unfortunately is all of the above (a-e). Sean and I applied for a NOLS course for the month of September. NOLS stands for National Outdoor Leadership School and provides all sorts of wilderness education - it's just like Outward Bound. Because my family did a lot of camping growing up I have always been interested in the outdoors and after a backpacking trip in high school I always wanted to learn more. This is the course that we applied for: Rocky Mountain Outdoor Educator. So this semester we are saving our pennies and planning to apply for financial aid and scholarships if we make it in.

After September? Yeah . . . we're still working on that.

The students love to talk about my upcoming wedding. Today I had a new class of freshmen students for oral English and I gave them an opportunity to ask me any question that they had. Almost all of them asked me about my relationship with Sean, dating, true love, American weddings, falling in love etc. One of the thing that tends to completely mystify my students is why I would even consider having my wedding in America. I don't really understand why this is so hard to understand. Students ask me all the time when my wedding is in China and if they can attend. When I explain that I am going to have my ceremony in America they look surprised and say, "Why?" After saying that I want to celebrate with my family and friends and that it would be too expensive for them to fly to China I ask them if they would ever consider having a wedding outside of China. They always reply, "Of course not!" and think it's a silly question. This happens over and over again and never ceases to amuse me.


One of my tutors surprised me recently with a wedding gift for Sean and me. She made some red pillows herself and cross-stitched some famous phrases on them as well. One says "A good marriage is from heaven" and the other says "Tying the knot." She told me that a long time ago it was tradition for elders of the bride and groom to give them red pillows so she was just following their example. Her card was so heartfelt and adorable that I asked if I could share it with you. Here it is in its original form:

"Dear Sean and Sarah,

I feel lucky to have friends like you. Sarah, I appreciate that you let me be your tutor. The time spent with you is one of my happiest periods of time. You're so patient and lovely that I love you - can I say that I love you? When I saw you in the classroom for the first time, I feel happy and lucky. You're gorgeous.

Sean, though I haven't talked a lot with you - sorry, but I'm sure you're the best. You know what? When I saw you one day after you shaved I thought you were someone else. By the way, many of us think you're handsome. By the way, I'm lucky to know you.

In my heart, both of you are my friends. So I'm really happy to hear that you're going to marry each other. Thank God! I believe you're made for each other. I sincerely wish that you'll be happy forever. I'll remember you forever. By the way, it's so cold. Take care!"

This week is the first week of classes and right after I got my schedule I started making a lesson plan for day one of European culture. Daniel, who taught the class last year, sent me all of his power points and lesson plan outlines which was a big help in knowing how to organize the course and what to cover. Usually the first day is pretty easy for me to plan. I introduce a little bit about me, find some creative or funny way to get them talking about themselves and finally explain the course and its requirements.

In my Western culture course last semester I had the students make personal flags and draw what was important to them. This semester I started out by asking what they would put on a world time line. We added some dates that they knew and then I put on some important dates as well. Then I circled the dates that the course would cover and explained what A.D./B.C./B.C.E./C.E. meant. We finished up the first hour by making personal time lines. I told the students to choose 10 events in their life that were memorable or funny and warned them that they would be sharing the time line with others and the whole class. After doing an example on the board, they got to work.


Obviously, Chinese students are not American students and sometimes my activities or ideas go completely differently than I had planned. This can make class a little awkward for me at times, but it's always entertaining. A recent comment from Mike's blog comes to mind, "If you want an endlessly fascinating job, teach people in a language other than their own. I get to do this for a living, and every day it’s a new experience."

One of the frequent differences that I experience is boundaries in what to share with the class. This one always takes me by surprise. Because most of my students are quite shy, I never expect them to be very open or personal. However, these expectations always turn out to be completely wrong and today was no different. On my time line I had examples of events like when I broke my arm, when I rode my first horse, when I met Sean etc. and I was hoping the students would follow my lead and for the most part they did. Others went into a little or a lot more detail.


To practice English, I had them pair up and share their time lines with each other for about ten minutes. Then I asked them to choose two events to share aloud with the class. As usual, some students wanted to talk for a long time and share their entire time line, some just said one thing, others wanted to share a long and detailed story pertaining to their time line. With over thirty students, this can take longer than I want and it's difficult to keep things moving without being a little rude.

What caught me a little off guard, however, were the particular events that the students were eager to share with the class. They were totally different than what American students would have shared in the same activity. It was hard to know how to respond to students who talked about really sad or heart wrenching stories so I usually said something like "that's too bad" or "thanks for sharing" or "oh gosh" and then kept moving on. Nobody else thought anything was weird though, maybe it was just me. Here are some examples:

"In 2003 I liked a boy but he didn't know"
"In 2008 I broke up with my boyfriend and it was heart breaking"
"In 2006 I fell in love"
"In 2011 I broke up with my partner TOTALLY"
"In 2008 I got drunk for the first time"
"In 1996 I got my first rabbit light (?)"
"In 2006 I was hurted by a rabbit"
"In 1997 I fell into a well and was rescued"
"In 2012 I will be dead" (many students really believe that the world will end in 2012)
"In 2007 I cried sadly for exams"
"In 2008 I got my first mobile phone and computer"
"In 1992 my mother told me when I was very little one day that when I was sleeping my uncle said I stole his money, she hit me and I cried loudly"
"In 1996 I had something wrong with my legs"
"In 2001 I learned swimming and nearly drowned"
"In 2010 I became fatter and fatter"
"In 1995 I fell from the second floor without being hurted"
"In 2008 my parents divorced"
"In 2008 I graduated from my high school and I cried a lot"
"In 2010 I crushed on a boy I've loved for 8 years"
"In 1998 I was mistaken for a boy"
"In 2004 I became a member of the Communist Youth League"
"In 1996 I began to learn the piano and it was a long and terrible experience"
"In 2011 I wore my first high heeled shoes"
"In 2007 I lost the computer exam and I was very ashamed"
"In 1997 my teacher hit me because of eating in the classroom"
"In 2008 it was my first time to look at the sea"
"In 1993 I hid in the big pipe made of steel with my brother for a day, the whole family set out to look for us"
"In 1999 I failed the exam and I erased the mark on the paper and was beaten"
"In 1993 many people said I was a beautiful girl but then I cut my hair and turned ugly"
"In 2004 I started my adolescent years which was the most ugly period in my life because of poxes (zits?). I was very dispirited"
"In 1998 I was seriously ill and nearly died"

For the most part the students listened to each other's events and were respectful and many stories made them all laugh. Then I showed them some pictures from my trip over winter break and I took pictures of them with name tags so I can learn their names. One girl told me that I was making her feel like a "criminal" doing this but overall it went fine. I'm still getting used to the classrooms that the school assigned. Instead of a screen at the front of the room, each student has their own computer which shows my powerpoint. It's interesting.