I learned very quickly that I was not made to be a substitute or "Guest Teacher" as they now call us. You need thick skin, a loud, authoritative voice, intense classroom management skills and a poised, cool demeanor even when chaos ensues. None of these things come naturally to me and unlike my teacher friends who have had classes and classroom experience on behavior management, I had no idea how to deal with the little monsters; it was like trying to reason with and herd cats.
I soon realized that substitute teaching is essentially like re-living the horrors of middle school and high school. In many classes I was ignored, disrespected, mocked, and even growled at by a student pretending to be a wolf. It was insane. Insert images of crumpled up paper-throwing and rubber band firing here (seriously). I sweated a lot and my hand got tired from writing up piles of ISS and ASS slips (who names a program After-School-Study by the way, that's just asking for trouble!) Substitute teaching, unfortunately, doesn't involve any teaching (which is the fun part) it is basically just babysitting for 30 or so hormonally-charged adolescents. God help me.
Two weeks ago on Monday I got a call in the wee hours of the morning to cover a class for a local high school for the entire week. I arrived at my post 20 min. ahead of time like we are supposed to and was informed by the secretary of the disheartening news. I had thought that maybe a teacher was out due to surgery or death in the family, but alas, this was not the case. This was the first day of a new trimester and the district still hadn't found a teacher for three nutrition classes and one parenting class. I was to be the fill-in for the week and was also informed that there were no lesson plans or even books as this was a new class offered. They gave me the rosters and wished me good luck. If you want a true nightmarish experience, try spending four 95 minute (95 minute!) class periods winging it with a bunch of 8th-12th graders regarding subjects you know next to nothing about. It was heinous.
But I rallied. I dug around in storage bins, talked to other teachers, researched on the internet and started lesson-planning like crazy (along with wishing that I hadn't accepted this job in the first place). Day by day things got a little better but the classes were by no means smooth which caused a lot of stress. Some other things that caused me anxiety were: a) I had no room of my own and had to "float" from other teachers' rooms using a rinky-dink cart, b) while I taught, the other teachers remained in their rooms as it was their planning hour, and c) I had many aides who stayed in the room to help with the plethora of kids with mental and physical impairments. Not only was I trying to pull a class together, I was doing it in front of an audience of certified teachers as well. It's safe to say that I was in way over my head.
Here's some of the things that I learned about secondary public school education:
1. The administration is not always behind you
2. How to use a Scantron machine
3. What EI means (emotionally impaired)
4. The basics of dealing with: Autism, Asbergers and physical disabilities
5. How to use an Elmo (gone are the days of the overhead projector)
6. The incredible amount of paperwork and phone calls that are required if you send a student to ISS (In school suspension)
7. That the morale of teachers is pretty low right now
8. That racial and socioeconomic tensions are high in the classroom even in 2011
9. How to lesson-plan at the middle and high school level
10. That we can't call it "Christmas Break" anymore but rather "Holiday Break"
11. I have learned a LOT about nutrition and parenting (if you have questions about your daily caloric intake, contraceptive options or the legalities of child support, just holler)
Currently, it's Sunday night before week 3 of this long-term sub. job. They still can't find a teacher who wants this position (not a huge surprise if you ask me). In fact, on Friday the principal called me into her office and offered me the full-time job on the spot until the end of the year (no matter that I am not certified nor have any background in these subjects). For $218/day I could continue this daily insane challenge. I thanked her for the opportunity but politely declined. I'm sticking it out until "Holiday Break" after which Sean and I are hoping to head out West and wait out a New Zealand visa working at a ski lodge. To all you other "Guest Teachers" out there, I applaud you and to the next person who has my job, I wish you the best of luck.
subbing (screw "guest teaching") is the woooooorst. god bless you.
I might never again complain about Spanish 102.01. *Might*
Super funny, but oh so true.... Teaching is hard, but subbing is really hard. One day I even went home in tears. You can do it - just a few more days!!
There's not enough money in the world to convince me to take that job. I heard you were subbing and I thought it was bad but subbing for special needs classes is probably the single worst job in the school system. I imagine the janitor walking by and shaking his head thinking, "there but for the grace of god go I." I also wouldn't do that job since I have some bad karam waiting for me given how badly I treated some the weaker middle school teachers I had. Well on the upside I bet they don't really expect much out of that class, if you can call that an upside.
When I heard you were subbing in the first place I had a mild panic attack. It sounds so scary to me, and I imagined it exactly as you described it. I know I could not deal with the stress of it. It's definitely takes some special skills to deal with that stuff. Sounds like you did a good job though because they wanted you to stay longer. Maybe you can leave some helpful tips for the next 'guest'.
Hilarious, Sarah!
My Dad happened upon your blog (from the link on ours), and he told me about this post. He taught for over 30 years, and now he's subbing "just for the fun of it." He, however, is subbing in the rinky-dink school where he taught for 30 years, and all the families still know him. He, and I, thought your post was very accurate. I am in no hurry to rush back to the classroom.
It's actually refreshing to have someone else point out the daily grind of public education (your top 10 was accurate!). I'm teaching 3 language arts and 2 world history classes to 6th graders in Orlando-- and let me tell you... some days even the "certified, experienced" teachers have those days. :)
But if I were you, I'd probably pick the New Zealand adventure, too ;)
Best of Luck!
Betsy Lancy (Linde's little sister)