One of my favorite things about being in China is listening to how English is used by non-native speakers of English (with full knowledge that I do the same thing, only worse, in Chinese). One of the most entertaining parts of English to listen to is how idioms are handled. For example, my students made my day today when I heard the following phrases in class:
"I usually knock off work at around six so I can meet with you after that."
"When you and Sean go out to eat together do you go Dutch?"
"The Chinese teachers here will try to ride on your gravy train."
Pretty awesome, right? The oddly used/misused/overused idioms is a daily and endless source of intrigue and hilarity here at the university. Another source of mild amusement is the selection of English names. Here are some of my favorites this year: Vassy, Trigger, Link, Unknown, Dream, Skye, Willow, Venssy, Garfield, Magic, Promise, Water, Breezy, Leaf, Liberty, Haidee, Delight, Stoney, Bieber, Hanike, Aquarius and Sugar.
Yesterday we had the meeting with the foreign language department heads and the other foreign teachers from Germany and Japan. The meeting was a little tedious as "Frank," assistant to the head honcho, "Baker", simply read the guidelines straight from the four page document we held in our hands. Since some of the Japanese teachers don't speak English, each statement had to be translated into Japanese by a translator who was also present for the occasion. Add to the fact that the leaders and teachers don't really follow the rules anyway and the meeting is just an excuse to sit around, drink tea and wait for the banquet which was later in the evening, it was kind of a waste of time, but all part of the experience regardless. As a bonus, however, we were all given moon cakes as a gift to celebrate the upcoming Mid-Autumn festival.
The real reason to keep Thursday afternoon and evening free, however, was to attend the foreign language banquet at the hotel on campus. Banquets are not only a feast of awesome (and sometimes exotic/strange) foods but also a crash course in an important part of Chinese society. There is much toasting, some speeches, drinking competitions, picture taking and dish after dish of insane food. You have to learn to pace yourself as even just one bite out of every dish will often leave you full enough to the point of having to crawl home, that is, of course, if you aren't completely tipsy after finishing all of the top-shelf alcohol they try and force you to imbibe in which case you will probably stumble incoherently home. Last night, Baker, was particularly fond of the phrase "bottoms up!" which he used excessively and Sean and Jordan happily encouraged while the females at the table visibly blanched.
A Chinese banquet is elaborate in every way: the food is expensive, the drinks are top notch and the dishes are dressed up with sauces, plants and flowers. A banquet typically starts with cold dishes and gradually changes to hot dishes and soups and finishes with some pastries and fruit and finally ends with rice or noodles if the guests (by some miracle) are still hungry. Last night's menu included (from what I can remember): cold beef, cold salted duck, cold broad beans, cold bean paste, cold sprouts pile, cold jellyfish, cold snails, warm chicken, eggplant and sausage logs (a foreigner favorite Baker reminds us), sushi, lamb, a variety of soups, warm shrimps, spicy beef 'tacos', spicy tofu, salty mushrooms, candied crunchy fish, stuffed and steamed buns, hot and spicy broccoli, sesame pastries, fruit and noodles in sweet soy sauce. Don't think for one second that you have to waste time by passing every dish around - the Chinese have solved this problem by placing a huge, glass lazy susan in the center of the table. One simply spins the glass to grab a bite of whatever looks appetizing.
It was quite an event and we are already looking forward to the banquets for Christmas, New Years and the banquet for the winners of the co-ed volleyball championship - with 6+ tall foreigners, how could we lose?
Yeah! Baker's rocking the peace sign like the Asian badass he is!!!